I’m doing another house/pet sitting gig and unlike last time (when I didn’t bring any DVDs and thus was forced to watch Beethoven and My Big Fat Greek Wedding), this time I came prepared. I went to the library and checked out a bunch of movies and watched them all. So here are my thoughts on them.

Beast

A woman living a lonely existence on a British island meets a mysterious man and falls in love but all is not it appears for either of them. The trailer made this movie seem like it would be a dark romance, and I suppose that’s technically what I got. But this was a little too dark for me. There were plenty of twists and turns and hardly any likeable characters. I will say that the setting and scenery was amazing, so if you can get past the depressing subject matter and love shots of elegant coastlines and quaint English villages, you might enjoy this.

Everybody Loves Somebody

A cynical L.A. doctor goes home to Mexico for her parents’ wedding and brings her flirty co-worker then her love life becomes confusing when she sees her ex whom she was engaged to and who left her ten years ago to travel the world with Doctors Without Borders. For a self-proclaimed “romantic comedy”, there wasn’t much romance or comedy in this. Clara, the main character, waffled constantly, rendering her unlikable and making me wonder why either of the two guys wanted her. I did, however, adore and want her parents’ beautiful house with its gorgeous view of the ocean and fabulous architectural design.

Oslo, August 31st

A recovering drug addict is about to be released from a sober house and goes to a job interview, then meets up with a friend and his sister. If that description sounds at all interesting to you, let me reassure you, the movie is literally what I just described. A critic for the L.A. Times actually states on the cover of the DVD, “Remarkable! Compelling! Gripping!” I would like to know what movie he was watching because it wasn’t this one. This one was boring and depressing. Nothing happened. Although, again, there were plenty of nice shots of Oslo, so if you’ve never been and want to see the city, just rent this movie.

Maggie’s Plan

A woman is getting ready to have a child with a sperm donor when she meets and falls in love with a married professor whose book he asks her to read since his wife isn’t interested in him or his writing. Three years later, they’re married with a kid but she’s not happy and decides to try and talk to ex-wife into taking him back. Sounds like a set-up for an intriguing screwball romantic comedy, right? Wrong. Everyone in this movie is insufferable, including Maggie, the main character. They mess with each other’s lives and cheat and put the kids through hell because of their emotional immaturity. Skip, skip, skip.

Molly’s Game

An ex-Olympic skier runs illegal poker games then gets caught by the feds and tries to avoid being sent to prison. Jessica Chastain is a great actress and does excellent work here. Unfortunately, this is an Aaron Sorkin written and directed film, so there’s a voice-over and tedious narration throughout the whole two and a half hours. So much unnecessary info, like about how poker works. The one upside was Molly’s hair, clothes, and make-up. They were AMAZING and I coveted everything she wore every time she showed up on screen.

Can You Ever Forgive Me?

A writer needing money pretends she’s found old letters written by celebrities (that she’s really written herself) and gets away with fooling people for awhile until she doesn’t. I’d heard a lot of good things about Melissa McCarthy and Richard E. Grant in this movie so I was excited to watch it. Sadly, when the credits rolled, I was not impressed. This movie was based on the real life of Lee Israel, who, if we’re to believe the movie, was not a great person. It was hard to feel sorry for her or even sympathize with her because she was just so horrible to everyone around her. Plus the plot wasn’t all that exciting.

Beyond the Lights

A rising pop star feels overwhelmed by fame and her momager, doesn’t think anyone “sees” her, and when a cop saves her from a suicide attempt, they start a romance. The music in this movie was good but there was nothing new here, story-wise. Full of cliches with no real surprises and the “love story” happened too fast to be believable. It also didn’t help that the leads had little to no chemistry.

Being 17

Two male teenagers who don’t like each other are forced to live together when one’s mom asks the other to move in due to a family medical crisis and they fall in love. I’m still scratching my head over this one. Yes, it was a “romance” but it was romance on a slow burn. Very, very slow. The two teens hardly talked and then all of a sudden they were in love. Plus the ending wasn’t really an ending. But, once again, the cinematography was fantastic with lots of beautiful shots of the French countryside in summer and winter.